October 28, 2011

Zombie Survival Gear: Gerber’s Gator Machete Pro -- For When The “Double Tap” Just Isn’t Enough - 7

Anyone familiar with Gerber knows that the company offers a wide array of field-ready chopping tools. And if, somehow, the Zombiepocalypse comes to pass, I want a Hummer with a plow on the front, a quarter ton of ammo and a half-dozen Gerber Gator Machete Pros for me and the boys, for those times when a double tap just isn’t enough. The aggressive, multi-purpose blade can be used as an axe, a machete or a knife to cleave your way through any non-breather conflict, and keep you among the living.

The Chopping Test

When I first saw the Gator Machete Pro, I thought of getting two of them to cross over the mantle for when my daughters reach dating age and start bringing boys home. I feel that the appearance of the tool speaks of both quiet and loud intimidation.

I started testing it by chopping green wood and dead wood. It chopped cleanly through a 2-inch diameter medium hardwood sapling in two strokes. A dead medium hardwood branch at 2 inches in diameter took 3 chops to cleave it in two, which I thought was pretty good. The overall length of the Gator Pro is 16.5 inches, with a full tang blade measuring 10.5 inches. That length, plus the forward weight from the hook, creates plenty of leverage and makes the tool cut much deeper than you’d expect given its mere 18-ounce weight. The Gator Grip handle reminds me of Gerber’s TacHide handle, which is as close to sticky as a handle can get.

Now being a little short on zombies in my neck of the woods, I’ll defer to a comment from a Gator Pro user in a more undead-infested part of town, who claimed that the Gator Pro “…can lop off heads like a hot knife through butter!” That’s an impressive endorsement. But wait, there’s more: “From clearing brush to clearing zombies…,” one loyal Gerber user wrote, and that short statement speaks well of the tool’s versatility. Now, let’s look at the grim features of this tool of mayhem.

Machete & Sheath Features

• Superior high carbon steel enhances strength, corrosion resistance and ease of sharpening.

• A sinister and effective gut hook, er, “brush hook.”

• The Gator Grip handle enhances comfort and prevents slipping when wet with water, mud or blood.

• A lanyard provides added in-hand security

• The military-grade nylon sheath is mold, mildew and bite resistant

• A sharpening stone is included with the sheath for good reason. Chopping through bone and chain link fences can sure take the edge from a blade.

What’s my favorite feature of this tool?

The weight, the handling, the hook: can you say Ultimate Tool of Destruction? But I’d have to say that my favorite thing about this machete is its handling. It moves where and when you mean it to move. On a side note, the sharpening stone was a thoughtful feature. I just wish there was a file or an oval stone for sharpening the brush hook.

If you’ve had the pleasure of using the Gator Pro against annoying brush or hoards of walkers, tell us about it in the comments. Happy Halloween, everyone!

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